"Today was a Fairytale"

In all actuality, today was far from a fairytale. But that's okay. I've been thinking about a lot of things lately; this post is going to be a window into just one of the things that have been on mind.

Here it goes...

Something we all have to realize at one point or another is that the only who controls our lives is us. Even if your religious, only you can control your life. Personally, I am a very avid Christian. While I try to live my life as God wishes me to, I still make all of my own decisions. I ask Him for guidance but when it comes down to it I'm still the one choosing what my next move will be. Sometimes I choose the right thing and other times... not so much.

I'm not saying all of this because I am deciding to be a rebel and completely disregard my parents and other authoritative figures. I am saying all of this because I have made a pretty big decision.

This entire school year I have had a conflicted love life. The kid I like seemed to like me for a while, but then things kinda died down- but my feelings were still there, and they still are. I'm not talking about just any kid either, this is a kid that I've found attractive since fourth grade. The only difference, now that I'm in tenth grade, is that I don't just think of him as a cute friend. I think of him as someone who I want to have a relationship with. Whether or not that's going to happen, who knows? My main problem this whole year has been that he has been sending out mixed signals, but as I recently realized, so have I.

So I'm going to step up my game, especially now that I'm aware that an ex-friend of mine is after him as well- although I don't think he'd ever go out with her (maybe that's just my wishful thinking). None the less, if I sit back and wait for him nothing is ever going to happen. Why would he pursue me if it seems like I have no interest in him? No more of that.

It's sad that we live in a culture where girls, and boys, feel like they have to hide such feelings from each other. Why shouldn't I tell him that I like him- a lot? If we act as subtle as the media encourages us to be, we will never reap any benefits.

So the moral here is... girls, don't be afraid to display your affections. Just don't smother your crush. Go for him. Go plant a garden. ;)

Make everyday a fairytale.

XOXO

PS- I GOT SECTION LEADER!